The Woman in the Mirror: Assigned This Mountain

The Woman in the Mirror: Assigned This Mountain

🌼 Date: Sunday, January 25, 2026

⚡ Energy: Empty. Drained to the studs.

🖤 Status: Day 4 of Granix. Zero strength. Zero fuel.

🤬 Outlook: Angry. Honest. Still standing.

Today required strength I simply did not have.
Even putting my recliner down took leg power that wasn’t there. That alone felt like a gut punch—another reminder of how far my body is from the woman I used to be.

But the real blow came when I walked past the bathroom mirror.

I didn’t recognize her.

She was bald.
Her face was gaunt.
She no longer stood with confidence.
Her skin didn’t look fresh or supple anymore.

And her chest…
What used to be beautiful, round, life-giving breasts are now two nipple-less mounds that barely resemble what they once were. Different sizes. Sharp edges. Sunken places where tumors once lived. Scars that scream don’t look at me—and definitely don’t touch me.

What once nourished my children now feels like part of some sick, twisted science experiment.

I stopped looking.
What was the point?
It’s not going to get better right now.

And I am angry.
So damn angry at cancer.

I hate what it has taken from my body.
From my brain.
From my sense of self.

People tell me this will pass.
That I’m strong.
That by this time next year it will all be behind me.

I know they mean well.
But most of them have never had cancer.
They haven’t stood in front of a mirror and met this version of themselves.
They haven’t had to grieve their body while still living inside it.

So today, I let myself be mad.

And then—somewhere between the anger and the exhaustion—it hit me:

Maybe this is my mountain.
And maybe I was assigned it not because it’s easy…
but to show others that it can be moved.

Even when the climb looks impossible.
Even when the mirror hurts.
Even when strength feels gone.

I’m still here.
And that counts for something.

💗 Tina –

One Badass Day at a Time